As a mother who stays at home with her kids, I must admit, I
have had these awkward moments when asked what I do for a living. After answering “Oh, I’m a stay-at-home
mom," I see the slight frown and the look of pity and then accept the abrupt
shift in the conversation to the weather.
I also admit that in response to that question I have downplayed
my motherhood and replied with
“I’m a writer”. (So cool
and bohemian sounding.) Or, “I’m a
youth group leader”. (Never mentioning that I’m a volunteer.)
To be honest my
full-time vocation is a mother to my children. But looking around at our
culture, it’s not easy to find anyone who will affirm the importance of
motherhood, a voice that will state, without apology, that being a mom is the
grandest career a woman could have.
That’s why I so appreciate Tracey Lanter Eyster’s book, Be
The Mom. Overflowing with good-natured
advice and encouragement, Eyster clearly communicates her love of
motherhood. Seriously, this book
bubbles over with the kind of
“Hey-I- know-what-you’re-going-through-and-I’m-in-your corner”
inspiration that will make you want to run out into the street and shout OH
YEAH, I’M THE MOM! Well, okay, I’m
exaggerating somewhat. But if you
are a mom struggling with your momhood, this book is a shot in the arm.
Not that Be the Mom is a cover-to-cover pep talk. Far from it. Eyster, chapter by chapter, points out the traps that moms
can fall into that can damage their relationships with their family and take
the wind out of their self-confidence.
From the “Just a Mom” Trap to the “Supermom” Trap, Eyster analyzes those
perceptions of motherhood that can tie moms up in knots and cause anxiety-induced
thoughts of self-doubt at three in the morning.
Be The Mom is a book that could have easily become a study
in maternal shortcomings - the kind of book that makes you not want to a get
out of bed in the morning. But
Eyster has the gift of encouragement with a coaching-not-criticizing approach.
Sure she points out the pitfalls of the “Martyr Mom” Trap,
but she makes you feel like she’s right in there with you, urging moms on to
see the big picture – to see what a gift from God motherhood really is.
Although Be the Mom is primarily a book that encourages the
stay-at-home mom, Eyster certainly does not overlook the mom working full-time
out of the home. She admits some
moms do have to work, but being the mom should always be of primary importance.
Speaking from experience, being the mom has come with some
life adjustments for Eyster, who shunned the corporate ladder in favor of
Chutes and Ladders, but she makes it clear, even through the most frustrating
and difficult times, it is worth it.
Advanced reader copy from Focus publishing through Net Galley in exchange for an honest review.
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